I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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