careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
