you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
