I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
