So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I enjoy the company of your penis
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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