we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
love makes seman taste better
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
