I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
