Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
