I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
