she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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