There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Randomize
