My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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