Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
