Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Randomize
