i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Randomize
