That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
