But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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