some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
