it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize