I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize