East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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