we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
