how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
