And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Randomize
