Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
