shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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