we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Randomize
