My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
