she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
ugly people sure do ruin things
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
