it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
