This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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