i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
