why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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