I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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