You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
My legs feel like baby dolphins
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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