no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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