And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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