i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
