When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
All I want is dick and wine.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
