So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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