Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
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