I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Still dying that you shit outside
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize