I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
