I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Randomize
