Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I have peed in a lot of sinks
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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