ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
