At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
