We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
