It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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