He asked to "fluff my boner.."
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
